--- title: 6 Secrets You Can Learn From the Happiest People on Earth description: What happens when you look at the happiest people and scientifically analyze what they have in common? Researchers did just that. Relationships, Relationships, Relationships There... canonical: https://time.com/14296/6-secrets-you-can-learn-from-the-happiest-people-on-earth/ author: Eric Barker article:opinion: true article:content_tier: free article:published_time: 2014-03-07T05:01:29.000Z article:modified_time: 2026-05-11T04:43:12.169Z article:section: Ideas og:title: 6 Secrets You Can Learn From the Happiest People on Earth og:description: What happens when you look at the happiest people and scientifically analyze what they have in common? Researchers did just that. Relationships, Relationships, Relationships There... og:url: https://time.com/14296/6-secrets-you-can-learn-from-the-happiest-people-on-earth/ og:site_name: TIME og:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltbeb6438ce74bf6dc/6986843b1eebf71da636faf1/happiest-people.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 og:image:width: 1200 og:image:height: 675 og:image:alt: 87172941 og:type: article twitter:card: summary_large_image twitter:title: 6 Secrets You Can Learn From the Happiest People on Earth twitter:description: What happens when you look at the happiest people and scientifically analyze what they have in common? Researchers did just that. Relationships, Relationships, Relationships There... twitter:image: https://static.time.com/v3/assets/bltea6093859af6183b/bltbeb6438ce74bf6dc/6986843b1eebf71da636faf1/happiest-people.jpg?branch=production&width=3840&quality=75&auto=webp&crop=16:9 ---  # 6 Secrets You Can Learn From the Happiest People on Earth by [Eric Barker](https://time.com/author/eric-barker/) ## Eric Barker Mar 7, 2014 5:01 AM UTC  2.38287e+007 2.38287e+007Getty Images by [Eric Barker](https://time.com/author/eric-barker/) ## Eric Barker Mar 7, 2014 5:01 AM UTC What happens when you look at the happiest people and scientifically analyze what they have in common? Researchers did just that. ## Relationships, Relationships, Relationships There was a clear answer to what differentiated these people from everyone else — and it wasn’t money, smarts, age, gender or race. **It was strong social relationships.** Via [The Happiness Advantage: The Seven Principles of Positive Psychology That Fuel Success and Performance at Work](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0307591549/?tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- The [Grant Study](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/03/lifelong-studies-agree-living-long-happy-life/) (which followed a group of men for their _entire lives_) found that **“the capacity to love and be loved was the single strength most clearly associated with subjective well-being at age eighty.”** Via [Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-being](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1439190763/?tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- **If you do one thing today to be happier,** [**spend time with friends**](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/01/single-important-today-live-long-happy-life/)**.** Not spending more time with people we love is something [we regret the most](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/what-are-we-most-likely-to-regret). (More on the power of relationships [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/08/what-is-important-in-life/).) ### 5 Horrible Habits You Need to Stop Right Now  Do Not Email First Thing in the Morning or Last Thing at Night “The former scrambles your priorities and all your plans for the day and the latter just gives you insomnia,” says Ferriss, who insists “email can wait until 10am” or after you check off at least one substantive to-do list item. Chris Pecoraro—Getty Images  Do Not Agree to Meetings or Calls With No Clear Agenda or End Time “If the desired outcome is defined clearly… and there’s an agenda listing topics–questions to cover–no meeting or call should last more than 30 minutes,” claims Ferriss, so “request them in advance so you can ‘best prepare and make good use of our time together.'” Sam Edwards—Getty Images/Caiaimage  Do Not Check Email Constantly Batch it and check it only periodically at set times (Ferriss goes for twice a day). Your inbox is analogous to a cocaine pellet dispenser, says Ferriss. Don’t be an addict. Tools like strategic use of the auto responder and Boomerang can help. Jetta Productions—Getty Images  Do Not Carry a Digital Leash 24/7 At least one day a week leave you smartphone somewhere where you can’t get easy access to it. If you’re gasping, you’re probably the type of person that most needs to do kick this particular habit. by nacoki ( MEDIA ARC )—Getty Images/Flickr RF  Do Not Let People Ramble Sounds harsh, but it’s necessary, Ferriss believes. “Small talk takes up big time,” he says, so when people start to tell you about their weekends, cut them off politely with something like “I’m in the middle of something, but what’s up?” But be aware, not everyone agrees with this one (and certainly not in every situation), and you may want to pay particularly close attention to norms around chit chat when traveling internationally. Reza Estakhrian—Getty Images ## Do More, Not Less **The happiest people are** [**those that are very busy but don’t feel rushed**](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/02/busy-happiness/)**:** --- > “” --- I know, you’re tired. You want a break. But doing nothing is not the answer. Too much time [is a burden](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/02/busy-happiness/): --- > “” --- **So what do you need to be doing?** [**Things you’re good at**](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2012/11/secret-happy-home-fulfilled-work/)**.** “_Signature strengths_” are the things you are uniquely talented at — and using them brings you joy. **People who deliberately exercised their signature strengths on a daily basis became significantly happier for** **_months._** Via [The Happiness Advantage: The Seven Principles of Positive Psychology That Fuel Success and Performance at Work](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0307591549/?tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- Signature strengths are the secret to [experiencing more “flow” at work and in life](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2012/11/secret-enjoying-work/). Exercising them is why [starving artists are happier](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/are-starving-artists-happier) with their jobs. The old saw “those who do what they love never work a day in their life” seems true. (More on the “more” theory of happiness [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/02/busy-happiness/).) ## Do Not Stay In A Job You Hate [Karl Pillemer](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/05/karl-pillemer-most-important-life-lessons-older-people/) of Cornell University interviewed nearly 1500 people age 70 to 100+ for his book “[30 Lessons for Living: Tried and True Advice from the Wisest Americans](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0452298482/?tag=spacforrent-20).” What piece of advice were they more adamant about than any other? More adamant about than lessons regarding marriage, children and happiness? **Do not stay in a job you dislike.** Via [30 Lessons for Living: Tried and True Advice from the Wisest Americans](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0452298482/?tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- Take a lesson from people who have already seen most of what life has to offer: do not waste time in a job you hate. (More on what you can learn about happiness from older, wiser folks [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/04/most-important-life-lesson/).) ## Plan Your Happiness It’s ironic that we treasure happiness so much yet often treat it as this random bit of alchemy we luck into. That’s silly. Passively waiting for happiness is a losing proposition. Happiness needs regular appointments. **Schedule the things that make you happy.** Is this overly simple and obvious? Yes. Do you regularly do it? Probably not. In my interview with Stanford professor [Jennifer Aaker](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/02/happiness-aaker-meaning-interview/), author of [The Dragonfly Effect](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0470614153/?tag=spacforrent-20), she explained: --- > “” --- **Look at the things that make you happy and plan them into your calendar and schedule.** Do not wait for happiness. Game the system. Happiness card-counting. Happiness Moneyball. Refuse to leave it to chance. (More on scheduling happiness [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/02/happiness-aaker-meaning-interview/).) ## Happiness Isn’t Everything No one confuses the type of happiness ice cream brings with the positive feelings one gets from raising a good kid. **Happiness is a vague word. We need happy feelings but we also need** **_meaning_** **in our lives.** And research shows they are [related but distinct](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/01/happy-meaningful-life/): --- > “” --- Researchers at Tohoku University in Japan did a 7 year study of over 43,000 adults age 40 to 79 asking if they had **_ikigai_** **(a Japanese term for meaning in life)** and then tracked their health. **People with** **_ikigai_** **were much more likely to be alive 7 years later.** Via [Pursuing the Good Life: 100 Reflections on Positive Psychology](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00AF6MZY8/?tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- **Running marathons is painful. Completing them is awesome. Studying is boring. Having a degree feels great.** **Happiness in the moment is not everything.** In his TED talk, Daniel Kahneman, Nobel Prize winner and author of [Thinking, Fast and Slow](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0374275637/?tag=spacforrent-20) discussed two different types of happiness that sound very similar to the distinction between happiness and meaning. The first is being happy _in your life_. It is happiness that you experience immediately and in the moment. The second is being happy _about your life_. It is the happiness that exists in memory when we talk about the past and the big picture. [Stories](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/03/4-steps-meaningful-life/) are key here. This is closer to “meaning.” (More on how to lead a meaningful life [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/03/4-steps-meaningful-life/).) ## Give — But \*Not\* Until It Hurts **Giving** [**makes us happier than receiving**](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/how-being-selfless-can-be-the-best-way-to-be)**.** In fact, it can [create a feedback loop of happiness](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/is-there-a-way-to-create-a-positive-feedback) in your life. Helping others [reach their goals](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/can-you-best-reach-your-own-potential-by-help) brings joy. [Doing nice things](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/whats-the-single-most-reliable-method-for-inc) for others today [can literally make you happier for the rest of the week](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/what-can-you-do-today-that-will-increase-your). However, being a martyr stresses you out and is bad for your health. Via [Give and Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0670026557/?tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- What to do? **Do all your giving one day a week.** Via [Give and Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0670026557/?tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- **How much should you give? Remember The 100 Hour Rule.** One hundred hours a year — in other words, 2 hours per week. Via [Give and Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success](http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0670026557/?tag=spacforrent-20): --- > “” --- (More on the power of giving [here](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2013/04/interview-wharton-business-school-professor-teaches-approach-give/).) Want to be a giver and be happier? **Share this post with a friend and spread some happiness.** **Join 45K+ readers.** Get a free weekly update via email [here](http://eepurl.com/o6uAD). Related posts: [What 10 things should you do every day to improve your life?](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2012/05/what-10-things-should-you-do-every-day-to-imp/) [Here are the things proven to make you happier](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2012/08/here-are-the-things-that-are-proven-to-make-y/) [What are the three ways to train your brain to be happy?](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2012/12/train-brain-happy/) _This piece originally appeared on_ [_Barking Up the Wrong Tree_](http://www.bakadesuyo.com/)_._ ### 5 Horrible Habits You Need to Stop Right Now  Do Not Email First Thing in the Morning or Last Thing at Night “The former scrambles your priorities and all your plans for the day and the latter just gives you insomnia,” says Ferriss, who insists “email can wait until 10am” or after you check off at least one substantive to-do list item. Chris Pecoraro—Getty Images  Do Not Agree to Meetings or Calls With No Clear Agenda or End Time “If the desired outcome is defined clearly… and there’s an agenda listing topics–questions to cover–no meeting or call should last more than 30 minutes,” claims Ferriss, so “request them in advance so you can ‘best prepare and make good use of our time together.'” Sam Edwards—Getty Images/Caiaimage  Do Not Check Email Constantly Batch it and check it only periodically at set times (Ferriss goes for twice a day). Your inbox is analogous to a cocaine pellet dispenser, says Ferriss. Don’t be an addict. Tools like strategic use of the auto responder and Boomerang can help. Jetta Productions—Getty Images  Do Not Carry a Digital Leash 24/7 At least one day a week leave you smartphone somewhere where you can’t get easy access to it. If you’re gasping, you’re probably the type of person that most needs to do kick this particular habit. by nacoki ( MEDIA ARC )—Getty Images/Flickr RF  Do Not Let People Ramble Sounds harsh, but it’s necessary, Ferriss believes. “Small talk takes up big time,” he says, so when people start to tell you about their weekends, cut them off politely with something like “I’m in the middle of something, but what’s up?” But be aware, not everyone agrees with this one (and certainly not in every situation), and you may want to pay particularly close attention to norms around chit chat when traveling internationally. Reza Estakhrian—Getty Images _Read next:_ [_10 Positive Habits That Could Change Your Life_](http://time.com/3502579/positive-habits-change-your-life/?xid=time%5Freadnext) [_Listen to the most important stories of the day._](http://time.com/newsletter/the-brief/?sl%5Fautoplay=true&xid=spl-fullbrief-article) ```json [{"@context":"https://schema.org","@type":"OpinionNewsArticle","@id":"https://time.com/14296/6-secrets-you-can-learn-from-the-happiest-people-on-earth/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://time.com/14296/6-secrets-you-can-learn-from-the-happiest-people-on-earth/"},"headline":"6 Secrets You Can Learn From the Happiest People on Earth","datePublished":"2014-03-07T05:01:29.000Z","dateModified":"2026-05-11T04:43:12.169Z","description":"What happens when you look at the happiest people and scientifically analyze what they have in common? Researchers did just that. 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